


Deep Heart

by NikaylaSarae



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Blood, Bruises, Confinement, Hurt/Comfort, Nausea, Negative Self Talk, Panic Attack, injuries
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-29
Updated: 2020-03-10
Packaged: 2021-02-28 03:41:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 12,619
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22963324
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NikaylaSarae/pseuds/NikaylaSarae
Summary: When Logan leaves the others in Patton’s room, Virgil takes matters into his own hands and ends up revealing a secret Patton wanted to keep hidden.
Comments: 11
Kudos: 119





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Takes place at the end of Moving On 1/2
> 
> Cross-posted with minor edits from my Tumblr account @stillebesat.

_“Please.”_

Patton’s broken voice rang in Virgil’s ears like a gong, reverberating through the entire room. 

Virgil could barely inhale a quarter breath, his thumbs running along the comforting soft edges of his new jacket. He hadn’t thought coming here would be the best of ideas. At least for him. Patton’s room was too stimulating, too full of things, cringe-worthy memories, sights, sounds. His senses were going into overdrive. He needed to get out of here. They all needed to get out of here.

**_“FINE.”_** Logan’s short retort cut through Virgil’s overloaded senses like a hot knife through butter. 

Logan glared at Patton, at Roman, his edges blurring with a black haze. “If you don’t want to listen to me, this is _your_ issue to resolve.”

What?! NO! Logan couldn’t leave him! He was the only clear voice of reason in here! 

Virgil opened his mouth, but no words came out as the dark fuzzing Logical Side vanished. Virgil choked on air, his heart taking off like a hummingbird’s wings. NO. Nonononono no NO! Logan couldn’t just...he...he left! 

Tensing up, his shoulders nearly touching his ears, he turned robotically to glance at the other three. They were going to go after him right? RIGHT?

_“--of Lost?”_ Roman asked, his voice garbled to Virgil’s ears. 

Lost? Who was lost? Logan? No Logan was gone. No. Roman was holding up a DVD. Virgil squinted, but in the brightness over taking the room, he couldn’t see through the glare coming off the shiny case. Was Roman talking about the show? Why would anyone want to remember that time shifting headache of confus-- 

He jumped, shying back as Patton and Thomas joined in, all three of their voices shrill and off pitch like a trio of squabbling seagulls as they held out more and more items and made more noises that assaulted Virgil’s overstimulated senses. 

A soft moan escaped from his lips. This was too much. 

Virgil swayed as Thomas once again opened the box of Christmas, letting the scent fill the air. His stomach heaved and he barely managed to swallow back the acid rising in his throat. Too strong, too overpowering, too much Eggnog. He hated the smell of eggnog. It just had Thomas’s 8th grade’s disastrous Christmas party written all over it. 

The others were completely oblivious to his state. They weren’t going to be of help. Virgil opened his mouth to try again, hoping his voice wouldn’t have the demon echo to it, but only a hoarse rasp came out now. 

His eyes darted everywhere for an escape. Up the stairs? No, that just led to Patton’s bedroom. That wouldn’t get him out of here. Nor could he sync out like Logan had as he couldn’t concentrate with all the stimuli assaulting him.

He rocked on his heels wincing as the light around him grew even brighter, the golden motes like road flares in his vision. Virgil scrunched his eyes, looking to where Logan had been. 

Why did Logan have to lea--Virgil cut off the thought, looking past Logan’s usual spot to the doorway behind it. He suddenly gasped for air he hadn’t known his lungs weren’t getting. Of course! The front door! The front door. He could get out. He could get out. There. Get out. Get out. 

GetoutgetoutgetoutgetoutGETOUT! 

Freedom. 

Virgil lurched forward, wobbling as his foot stiffly tore away from the landing, landing on the first step, the second foot soon following onto the next step. 

Getoutgetoutgetoutgetoutgetout. 

He had only eyes for the door. If he stayed longer he’d hurt Thomas with his anxiety, not something Thomas needed. The others could make him happy here, but Virgil...his chest heaved in quick shallow breaths as he broke into a run, darting clumsily to the door. 

Freedom. 

Getoutgetoutgetoutgetout. 

He grabbed onto the handle. 

“VIRGIL!” 

Patton’s desperate cry rang out behind him. 

“DON’T--” 

Don’t leave? Too late. He was out of here. Virgil yanked the door open only to be met by a blinding flash of white light.


	2. Chapter 2

Virgil shivered as a cold breeze ruffled through the hair on his head, moving down his neck like ice covered skeleton fingers. He blinked, his vision fuzzy but thankfully not overstimulated in the unfamiliar mostly dark space. He stayed still. Searching the darkness, wary of the sudden absence of bright stimuli that had had him running in the first place. This wasn’t his room. Nor was it the hallway outside of Patton’s room. What was this place? He took a calming breath, letting his senses adjust. Wherever it was, the space felt tiny. 

How tiny though? A box? Was he in a box? Swallowing down a flare of panic, he reached out, only to cry out with a deep demonic roar as a thousand individual pricks dug into his skin. 

_Useless  
Worthless  
You can’t do this.  
What good are you?_

The whisperings of self-doubt rustled in his ears as he winced, half curling up in on himself. He snapped his mouth shut, cutting off the sound, but not the whispers. 

_Can’t ever do anything right.  
Despicable  
Good for nothing.  
You have nothing to offer.  
Ever.  
Waste of space._

Virgil gritted his teeth, making himself hold still so the voices would stop. He knew those whispers of self-doubt. Those creeper vines could strangle any bright thought, hope, or idea that sprouted up in Thomas’s mind if they weren’t found and torn apart. He fought them often to protect Thomas, almost as much as Roman did unknowingly when he went on quests. But what were they doing here? Why was he trapped in them now?!

He tugged at the vines, wincing as they dug deeper into his skin. They clung tenaciously like fishing hooks. He couldn’t tear them apart like he usually could, to get them out. They were too thick for his hands. Which meant these particular vines had been left to fester for far too long. He couldn’t stop another demonic roar tearing from his lips in response to the thorns. His voice echoing around the space before he could shut himself up. 

_Such a hopeless case.  
Too soft.  
You can never be good enough.  
Why would anyone ever love you?  
Ever.  
No one will ever love you.  
Stupid.  
Hopeless._

“What is this place?” Roman asked in a trembling whisper from somewhere to Virgil’s right. His voice no longer boisterously energetic. Instead, he sounded like an invalid on his last legs. “I feel.” He coughed. “I feel...weak.” 

Virgil turned to Roman’s voice, searching the darkness. Had the vines of doubt gotten to Roman as well? Virgil couldn’t see, but he knew that Creativity couldn’t flourish in such an environment. 

_Such a fake.  
No one cares.  
Can’t ever do anything right._

**“Roman.”** Virgil winced at his voice. Why was he speaking like this?! The darkness was stressful, yes, the vines frustrating, but nothing he hadn’t handled before. His voice should be normal.

“Virgil?” Roman whispered, nearly as breathy as the vines of doubt. “Your voice.” 

**“I know, are you alright? Where are the others? Where are we?”** Wait, Roman had asked him where they were already. So he’d never been here either. Was Virgil reacting to Roman? The Prince must have followed after him when he’d left Patton’s room. But Roman...sounded...well, not normal but not panicked either. Just as confused as Virgil was. Roman wouldn’t be anxious over a little darkness either, not with all the quests he did. But the others...The others shouldn’t be panicking...he frowned. 

Were they panicking? Thomas? Patton? Logan? That had to be it. But which one? Logan? He’d been the most upset, the one with the dark edges around him when he’d left. But Virgil had just tried to leave Patton’s room! He shouldn’t have gone into Logan’s nor should it be this shadowy cold place. 

“I don’t--” 

“You’re in...” Lights of different colors; reds, blues, greens, purples, and yellows began to flicker on from different directions, throwing shifting shadows all over the room, distorting it like a creepy clown’s nightmare circus. Broken furniture, torn up stuffed animals, shredded papers, shattered glass. All interlaced with thick barbed vines of self-doubt. “...my room.” Patton choked out. 

Virgil inhaled sharply as the shifting lights fell on Morality. He took a step forward, but the thorny vines of doubt held him back. **“Patton.”** _Patton._ No. Not Him. This couldn’t be his room. 

_Can’t ever do anything right, can you?  
Waste of space.  
No good  
You’re no good at all._

The father figure looked like he’d been beaten to within an inch of his life. His eyes blackened and bruised behind his shattered glasses. Blood on his cheek mixing with the blood coming from his split lip. His blue shirt was torn right over his heart where large sutures seemed to barely be holding him together. He had one arm in a sling, the fingers bandaged but red. The cardigan was knotted tightly against his neck like a noose, chains hanging down from them to pool at his feet. 

Patton’s bottom lip trembled. “I’m sorry.” He whispered, tears streaming down his face. “I’m sorry.” 

“Your room?” Thomas spoke up in a tear clogged voice. 

Virgil winced, focusing on the center of the shattered room where Thomas stood, thankfully free of vines, but looking tiny from Virgil’s perspective. In fact, the whole room looked smaller. Virgil inhaled sharply. Oh no. He’d gotten bigger. He now towered over the others like an enormous black shadow. This. Was. Not. Good. He wasn’t supposed to have this much of a presence in the other’s rooms! Anxiety and all its related problems should be focused in his domain. Not here. Not overrunning Patton’s room! 

Thomas’s eyes were red and puffy with tears streaming down his face, his usually vibrant clothing dull and washed out. He hunched in place, in Virgil’s shadow, holding himself as if keeping a tight grip on his center would keep himself standing. 

Virgil tried to crouch down to get Thomas out from under his shadow, but he was too large. He only triggered the vines. 

_You’re unlovable.  
Can’t even hold a smile.  
Weakling  
You should have done more.  
Despicable  
You should have loved harder._

Thomas shivered, hugging himself tighter. “But...before that was your roo--”

Patton shook his head miserably, blue and purple lights flashing across his face as he looked down at the ground, at the shattered picture frames face down at his feet. “I told you...I’m at the center of your feelings. This...this is my cur-current center.” The cardigan around Patton’s neck gained more chains, pulling backwards, the sleeves pressing against his throat, though Patton didn’t seem to notice. “You want--wanted happy, s-s-s-sooo your thoughts took you to Nostalgia Nirvana. A safe room.” He inhaled raggedly, black eyes getting darker. “Th-the part of your feel--feelings that are remembered behind rose-colored lenses. Where you can’t fe-feel hurt. It’s not--not your tr-true feelings.” 

“Patton.” Roman whispered, from his slumped position, elbows on the TV stand barely keeping him from sliding to the floor. His usually form fitted uniform swamped his boney frame. His eyes had sunken deep into his face. His hair falling greasy and lank over his face. “How? I never saw, this…it was always...before.” He rasped.

Patton gritted his teeth. Hands clenching, as red lights flashed across him.

Virgil tensed as Patton fuzzed with black edges. Oh no.

“You never **_WANTED_** to see **_MY_** room!” Patton nearly yelled, his own voice taking on the same demonic tones as Virgil’s. He threw his good hand up in the air. **_“Well here it is now!”_**

**“Patton.”** Virgil tried, again fighting against the vines of self doubt holding him in place. 

He glanced to Roman. He was the Prince! The Knight! He should be rescuing them. But Roman looked like he’d hardly be able to lift a finger, let alone lift his sword. The Prince had wasted to barely a shadow of his former self.

_You can’t do anything right.  
Worthless  
Why do you ever think this would work out?  
You’re too soft._

Virgil bared his teeth. He needed to get out of these vines! Lessen his presence here. Patton didn’t need their negativity. His Negativity. No wonder Virgil had been triggered earlier, if anxiety was already high in the room, he’d be the first to be susceptible to it especially when it wasn’t originally his. No. Patton was suffering enough. He needed help. **“You need to--”**

**“No.”** Lightning crackled around the room as Patton cut Virgil off. “You all only wanted to see the **_HAPPY MOMENTS.”_** He roughly brushed at his eyes, knocking his glasses askew. 

“Because you’re always the positive one, Padre.” Roman whispered. He groaned, bowing his head as his elbows slipped from the stand, sending the Prince to the floor. “You’re... the happy thoughts.” 

Patton’s eyes flashed through their tears. **“I am not just those. Not right now. But that’s all I EVER AM to you. ALL HAPPY. THE FUN ONE. The NAIVE ONE.”** He shook his head violently, sending his glasses tumbling to the ground, the already cracked frames snapping on impact. **“I can’t be anything BUT HAPPY because that’s all you WANT from ME. Well. Guess. What.”**

“Patton,” Thomas cut in, his own voice trembling, eyes earnest. “I had no idea--” 

**“Of course not!”** Patton snapped. He slammed his fist against the crumbling window sill sending shards of wood flying. The torn drapes fluttered around him as Thomas flinched, stumbling back under Patton’s glare. His voice cracked. **“I’m _all_ of your feelings, Thomas. All. Of. Them. Do you not know how much it’s HURT these past few months?! Pretending everything is alright when it’s not?! I’m _breaking apart._ ”** His hand brushed the large sutures in his chest. **“And it’s Not Getting Better. It Never Will.”**

**“No, Patton. That’s wrong.”** Virgil ground out desperately. They had to get through to him! 

_It’s never going to be okay again.  
Broken  
We can’t be fixed.  
Useless  
What can you do? Nothing.  
Nothing.  
Nothing._

“Padre, please... we can... talk... abou--” Roman rasped, struggling to get the words out, his fingers feebly digging at the stained carpet.

**“I’m sick of talking. Sick of thinking.”** Patton growled, the lights flashing yellow and red across his face. **“Logic can’t help here.”**

Another breeze of freezing air swept through Virgil’s hair as Patton snapped his fingers. A rattle of chains sounded from the darkness of Logan’s spot. 

**“This is MY Room.”**


	3. Chapter 3

Virgil jerked his hands up as the darkness swelled, fighting to keep himself from increasing in size along with it. It wasn’t working. He gritted his teeth. **“Pat, calm dow--”**

Thomas cried out in agony, falling to his knees, his fingers digging into his scalp as blue glacial ice crackled and flowed across the floor from Logan’s spot like a ghostly oil slick, frosting all it touched. 

**_“Thomas!”_** Virgil and Roman cried out together.

Virgil sprang forward instinctively only to be jerked back by the vines tightening convulsively in response to the frost spreading through them. He slammed into the wall behind him, cracking it. 

_Worthless.  
So slow.  
Should have seen the signs.  
Too trusting.  
What good is it to be nice?  
Nice guys always finish last._

Roman only made it as far as his knees, fumbling for his sword before he fell forward onto his elbows, gasping for breath. “Thomas. Hang...hang in there!” 

**“Don't worry.”** Patton said as the drapes behind him twisted, tearing further. **“I'm sure the _feeling_ will pass.”** He fingered the sutures on his chest. **“It will all be just fine.”**

**“This isn’t fine, Patton!”** Virgil yelled, clawing at the frozen vines, his breath frosting in front of him.

_No one will love you.  
Weak.  
What’s the point of fighting it?  
Nothing works.  
Nothing helps._

“It hurts.” Thomas moaned, curling up tighter into a ball, his fingers a stark white against his dark hair.

“It will….be….okay...Thomas.” Roman gasped out still trying to pull his rusted sword out of its sheath.

Virgil gritted his teeth, eyes only on Thomas. **“You’re hurting Tho--”**

Patton snorted, interrupting Virgil. **“Oh now it HURTS!”** He threw his good hand up in the air, the colored lights getting more sickly in their glow. **“When a lil itty bitty brain freeze comes your way that's what causes you pain? That’s what makes you want to fix things? Not the feelings nor the emotions but the lack of thought!?”** He took a step forward, kicking the broken picture frames out of his way. **“Now it hurts? Everything hurts, Thomas.”** Patton coldly stated, his cardigan accumulating more chains. **“What's one more needle in the pin cushion going to change? Nothing.”**

Roman let go of the sword, in favor of pushing himself onto his knees. “Things... will get better... if we're optimis---”

**“You can't just think away the pain, Roman. It doesn't work like that. The mind can't trick the heart”** Patton gestured and the glacier occupying Logan’s spot kicked up into a bitter cold whirlwind, blurring the hallway behind as it swirled in a mini blizzard of ice and shredded paper.

A flash of purple light crossed through it as the blizzard vanished as suddenly as it appeared, briefly piercing the darkness. Virgil shot upright, ignoring the thorns plunging into his skin. **_“LOGAN!”_**

_It’s all for nothing.  
It can’t be fixed.  
Forever broken.  
Can’t think. Can’t do. Can’t be.  
Never good enough.  
It’s pointless to try._

The Logical Side knelt in his spot, covered in a thick layer of ice and pulsating ember colored chains, leaving him unable to move more than his eyes. Eyes filled with terror as he stared at Patton, a soft whimper escaping through the gag that dug into his mouth, leaving red marks at the corners. 

Virgil’s vision blurred as the air left his lungs, leaving him gasping for air. _No._ No! Logan couldn’t be trapped in this place too! Not like that! He was the one who found the solutions to their problems! He was the one to point out a path to take. He couldn’t be reduced to... to... a statue! 

Patton bared his teeth. **“Lil LoLo ran out of things to say a long time ago. Don’t you agree Thomas?”** He demanded.

Thomas shuddered, slowly lifting his head, one hand covering one eye, the other falling to clutch his heart. “Pat, please.” He whispered, fresh tears streaming down his cheeks. “Don’t.” 

**“Don’t what? Don’t FEEL? Don’t be SAD? Don’t be ANGRY?”** Patton spat, taking another step forward, crunching his glasses underfoot. **“Just cheer up, Patton. Be Happy, Patton. Nothing is wrong. It will all be fine. Is that what you want me to do?! Just make a joke and pretend it’s all alright is that it?”**

“No, of course….not.” Roman feebly raised a hand only to drop it, crying out like he’d been physically hit when Patton whirled on him, glaring daggers. Roman jerked backwards to huddle wide-eyed against the TV stand, fresh cuts marring the side of his face and neck. 

**“Then you should have listened to me! Shouldn’t you?”** Patton yelled. More chains, thicker and darker, rolled off of his cardigan, hanging like a metal cape down his back. **“I told you my room was a mess. I told you that this wasn’t a good idea. I tried to tell you and YOU DIDN’T LISTEN TO ME.”**

Virgil clenched his fists. This was wrong. This shouldn’t be happening. He should have done more. Been a better lookout, a better protector to the others. They all should have done something. Noticed Patton was suffering! Virgil should have been more vocal before they’d entered Nostalgia Nirvana about letting Patton state his opinion. They should have listened. They needed to listen now, find a way out. But how? What could they do? Logan was trapped! He was the one who always had the answers they needed. 

Virgil inhaled, blinking, his vision clearing to settle on the Logical Side. What could they do? His heart jumped. Logan was staring at him. Wide-eyed and pleading. They sharpened on Virgil before his eyes flicked to Patton and back to Virgil. Again and again he repeated the motion.

_“This is Your Problem to resolve.”_ Logan’s words resounded in his head. Virgil’s breath caught. No way. Had Logan known that--of course he had. The Logical Side had seen the signs of the others being corrupted when they’d visited Virgil’s room. He’d noticed the signs in Patton’s room, but being Logic...he couldn’t have helped. Not with feelings. Not with emotions.

Virgil shook his head slowly, staring at Logan incredulously. He had to be kidding. Logan had to be kidding. How could he expect him, Anxiety to fix this?!

Logan’s eyes softened, his eyebrows briefly rising and falling. A nod. Silent encouragement. Pleading for help. Logan expected him to fix it. He was placing his faith in him to get them all out. 

**“You’re right.”** Virgil mumbled, his mind only half on what Patton was saying. How could He fix this? What could he do? 

**“I’m what?”** Patton demanded, whirling, his good hand resting on his hip. 

Wait...didn’t Logan always state that three wrong turns made a right? Two negatives could make a positive? His heart took off in his chest as an idea sparked. 

Logan’s eyes brightened, hope burning brightly in his gaze.

Virgil gave Logan the tiniest of smiles. Two negatives huh? He tore his gaze away from the Logical Side’s frozen form, looking down to Patton. **“I said. You’re right. We should have listened to you.”**

But not to Patton now. No. Not to him now. He was hurt. He wasn’t thinking straight with all the emotions, all the self-doubt filling his room. Patton was suffering, and who knew suffering better than Virgil? **“But do you think terrorizing us and weakening us is the way to go about it, Dad?”**

Patton hesitated, looking up to Virgil. **“Kiddo.”** He whispered, his good arm rising to sling his other arm rested in, cradling it.

Virgil straightened, his breathing evening out as he turned fully to Patton. He could feel Logan’s eyes on his back. Full of confidence. Logan believed Virgil could do this. He could do this. The hooks pulled out of his skin, the shadows in the stairwell darkening around him as he focused on the upset Side. **“Has that ever helped Thomas in the past? When I’ve done it? Has it ever done anything good in the long term?”**

They couldn’t go on like this. Patton couldn’t go on like this. He couldn’t hide his feelings from them any more, but they also couldn’t stay here. Not when his room was so riddled with the vines, with darkness. Broken. 

Patton wavered, but shook his head. **“So what? You want me to pretend everything is okay too, kiddo?”** Patton demanded, narrowing his blackened eyes as green light flashed across him. **“Why do you get to be the only one who can be upset?”**

Virgil rolled his shoulders, the vines slipping off him as he focused. Breathe. Relax. He could do this. Confidence. Logan, Roman, and Thomas all needed him. He could do this. This was his area of expertise. Anxiety.

**“Of course not. It’s not okay. Nothing is okay right now.”** Virgil shook his head, letting his clenched hands fall open. **“Our future is rather bleak currently, so I say go ahead.”** He stepped down from his spot, though it hardly made a difference to him. He still towered over everyone, over Patton. A black avalanche, ready to crash down and consume all in his path. **“Be upset. Take it out on us. Nothing is ever going to be okay again, so why try and pretend otherwise?”**

Patton inhaled raggedly. **“It’s not okay.”** His fingers dug at the sutures in his chest. **“It hurts.”**

**“Of course it does. Why? Because it’s true. Focus on this. Focus on the fact that We. Can. Never. Be. Happy. Again.”** Virgil took a step forward, relieved to see Patton hunch in place as Virgil’s shadow fell over him. No one liked anxiety. Not even when Patton was full of his own version of it, of despair that things couldn’t get better. **“You can never be happy again, because no one can replace that hole in your heart. That wound will never heal.”**

Patton swallowed hard, shoulders slumping. **“It won’t.”** He whispered. He gritted his teeth. **“This can’t be fixed Love only hurts.”** He lifted his head, glaring at the others.

“Virgil, that’s not...how...love wor--”

Virgil jerked his hand up, cutting Roman off. **“Your idealism isn’t needed, Princey.”** He growled turning his attention to weakened Side. _Keep going._ He mouthed to the Roman. **“Not every relationship ends with True Love’s Kiss.”** _Fight._ His eyes flicked to Patton then back to Roman. **“There are No Happily Ever Afters in the real world. Grow up.”**

Patton flinched, taking a step back, nearly falling over the chains pooled around him. 

“That’s not true, Virgil.” Thomas denied from behind. “You know tha--”

**“That no one cares?”** Virgil asked, turning to Thomas. Who’d managed to get to his feet, swaying, now hugging himself tightly. Virgil shot him an encouraging smile. _Keep going._ He mouthed. **“You need to stop smelling the roses, Thomas. No. One. Cares.”**

“We care.” Thomas said slowly, eyes searching Virgil’s. “We all care.” He looked to Patton, gripping his chest tighter. “We care, Patton. We do!” 

Virgil snorted, turning away. Raising an eyebrow to Roman. _Fight me._ **“Sure you do. It’s obvious here how much you cared. You’ve all cared soo much since the break-up.”  
“You shoved the feelings aside. You tried to not think about them.”** Blue light flashed across Patton’s face, fresh tears running down his cheeks. His clenched hands slowly relaxing.

Roman’s sunken gaze sharpened. ““It hasn’t...all...been skipping through the meadows, picking...daisies...Patton, but we were….still...able to be...happy. You….know...that.” He gasped out, struggling to sit up straight, clinging to the TV stand. “We can’t... be... sad all the time.” 

“We’ve met so many people that made us smile. ” Thomas pleaded. “People that made us laugh, that made us forget the ache.”

Virgil flashed Roman a smile of approval, wishing he could do the same to Thomas even as he shook his head, taking another step towards Patton. **“Forget it? Ha. Did you forget it Patton? Did the pain go away?”**

**“N-No...”** Patton stuttered, his voice wavering. 

**“There’s a void there.”** He jabbed a finger towards Patton’s heart. 

Patton cringed, inhaling raggedly. His hand brushed the sutures over his heart before he reached up to hold onto a chain coated cardigan sleeve. He gripped it tightly, hand shaking. 

Virgil kept his own hand steady, conscious of the others eyes on him. **“And no matter what is done. It’s never going away. Because no one cares about how you feel. How Thomas feels. No one ever listens to the heart.”**

“That’s not true! We do listen.” Roman cried out, struggling to stand.

Virgil snorted. **“Oh, _sure_ you do.” **

**“You don’t listen to me. You listen to Logan more than me.”** Patton retorted glaring through his tears at the bound side. He tugged forcefully at his cardigan, but the chains prevented it from budging.

Virgil shifted his feet, blocking Logan from Patton’s view. **“Logic wins.”** He intoned. **“Every time.”**

Patton whimpered. **“Yes.”**

“He does not!” Roman cried out. His grip slipped from the stand as he tried to straighten. He fell hard against the wall, knocking the bent lamp to the floor with a clatter, making Patton jump, turning back to him. 

**“Roman.”** Patton’s hand half lifted from his cardigan before falling back to grip it. 

Virgil exhaled, slowly allowing his presence to withdraw, his shadow to shrink while Patton was distracted. 

“Patton, logic doesn’t... understand creativity.” Roman pushed against the wall, shakily bracing himself as he stared down Patton. “You...do.” His eyes flicked to Virgil. 

Virgil sent a tiny smile to Roman, the barest of nods of encouragement. _Go on._ He mouthed as he continued pulling the darkness away.

Roman drew in an unsteady breath. “You’re the one…. who inspires…. Me.” He said staring into Patton’s eyes. “You’re the one who…. motivates us to try out…. my ideas even if they don’t logically appear... to be possible.” Roman groaned, clutching at his chest. “I listen. To...you.” 

Virgil scoffed, moving another step closer to Patton. **“Not when it truly counts. Not in this. But none of that matters, right, Patton? At the end of the day. It doesn’t matter. They don’t care about your true feelings. Just what makes them feel good.”**

**“Ri--right.”** Patton tugged at the cardigan around his neck, staring at Roman, feet shifting in place, pushing away the chains pooling at his feet.

“I didn’t know you... weren’t showing me... your true room!” Roman cried out, wobbling as he pushed away from the wall. “You know I take things... at face value.” His hands clenched as he lowered his head. Swaying in place. “How was I supposed... to know it wasn’t... your real room?” He groaned again, hunching as he gripped his chest. “I never knew it was... anything but that!”

“Roman, **stop.”** Patton choked out. He reached out, struggling against the cloak of chains holding him in place. “You’re **hurting** yourself.” 

Virgil waved a hand dismissively in the air, the flickering colored lights changing to normal as they crossed over him. **“It’s all pointless, Patton. We shouldn’t even try anymore. We can’t be our best selves. Broken as you are. Not with Thomas’s relationship status back to single. He should just hide in his room. Never go anywhere. Do anything. No one even cares about your feelings in the first place. Why? Because no one listens to you.”**

“I do.” Roman gritted his teeth, sinking to the floor. “I would. Thomas...Thomas’s friends…”

**“Are just pretending. You know they’re sick of it, Princey. All the moping about. No one wants that around them.”** Come on guys. Keep going. A little more and he could help lessen the pain.

**“That’s** not **true.”** Patton whispered, fresh tears streaming down his cheeks, the black haze around him fading. **“They listen.** They’ve been **here.** Supportive. **A shoulder to** cry **on.”**

Virgil shook his head, drawing closer to Patton, pulling the shadows back into himself, decreasing his presence further in the room. He was nearly the same height as Patton now. **“They think Thomas should just get over it. Be happy. Why should we hold up a positive front for them? Stop believing things are going to get better, Patton. They won’t.”**

“They will!” Roman cried, sunken eyes never leaving Patton’s face. “One failed... relationship doesn’t... mean all others are doomed! That our... future one won’t be...better.” 

Virgil snorted. Hand hovering near Patton’s shoulder. Come on Patton. Let go. **“Sure it does. We tried. We failed. We won’t ever experience that sort of thing ever again. Give it up, Princey. Anything we do will only end in more pain.”**

“It doesn’t mean I can’t enjoy what friendships I have.” Thomas spoke up, tone soft. He stepped forward back into Virgil’s line of sight, still hugging himself. 

Patton tore his eyes from Roman, trembling as he looked to Thomas. His hand spasming in its grip on the chain covered sleeve.

“I can’t fully fill the void that was left, but...I don’t have to be constantly consumed by it.” He took a breath, scrubbing at his eyes. “Patton. I shouldn’t have tried to fight against the ache, against feeling sad. It wasn’t fair to you. For me to pretend things were fine when it wasn’t. That you felt you had to always be happy for everyone.” 

“It wasn’t.” Patton mumbled, voice hitching, heedless of Virgil’s closeness.

“I”m sorry, Patton.” Thomas whispered. “I am so sorry.” 

Patton’s lips trembled, tears streaming down his face. “I’m sorry too, Thomas.” He replied just as softly, hand dropping from the chains to fall at his side.

Now! Virgil grabbed Patton’s cardigan, gritting his teeth as it burned him. Geez, how much guilt and despair did this thing hold?! Forcefully he tugged at it, pulling its chain covered weight free from Patton’s shoulders. 

Patton gasped, hand snapping out to grab at the cardigan and missing as Virgil darted to the corner, pulling the chains out of Patton’s reach. _“VIRGIL!”_

Virgil turned, offering Patton a humorless smile in the face of his panicked shout. **“This old thing was weighing you down was it not, Dad?”** He asked holding up the cardigan. It felt like lifting a tank.  


Patton gaped at him, hand outstretched.

**“Not anymore.”** Virgil clenched his fists and tugged at the fabric. Purple lightning crackled over the cardigan, turning it and the chains to dust in the blink of an eye.


	4. Chapter 4

Like the first rays of sunlight breaking through after a major storm, Patton’s room brightened. The heavy tension of impending doom withdrew as the black shadows swirled away from everyone, clinging to the corners and the ceiling like an overcast day. Lurking. Still very very present, but no longer menacing the others. 

Virgil lowered his hands, fingers twitching with purple sparks as he rubbed them against each other, getting rid of the sticky feeling of despair that tried to cling there. He made no other movement, heart in his throat as he focused on Patton. 

Patton swayed in place, his eyes glazed over. He had his mouth half open as if to try and call Virgil’s name again, his outstretched hand trembling. Behind him the curtains fluttered with a warm gentle breeze. 

“Patton?” Thomas whispered, taking a step forward. 

Virgil jerked his hand up, his eyes not leaving the injured Side. **“Wait.”** He tensed. Shoot. His voice! The room was still too heightened for him to be able to speak normally. He held his breath as the shadows above swirled, drifting over to Patton and Virgil. Please don’t, Please don’t. 

Patton inhaled raggedly as the shadows sank lower, the vines crept closer. 

No! Patton. Virgil opened his mouth and grimaced. He couldn’t speak with his voice. It would only incite the darkness further. Even though he appeared his normal size now...approaching Patton could very well make it all worse. 

“Patton. It’s….alright.” Roman called out as strongly as he could. “You’re fine. It’s gone.” 

Virgil’s heart jumped as the vines paused in their approach.

“The cardigan is gone.” Thomas joined in, he shifted in place, but didn’t try to approach. “It won’t weigh you down anymore.”

Patton’s fingers twitched, a soft moan coming from him, causing the shadows above to hesitate. 

There! A weak spot. Virgil raised both hands up to the swirling darkness, a deep rumble emanating from his throat as he struck at the center of the swirling shadows, standing his ground as he shoved it back. The shadows couldn’t have Patton. His eyes flashed, fingers curling like claws, drawing the darkness closest to Patton away. They couldn’t have anyone here.

“We’re here for you, Pat.” Thomas stretched out his hand, reaching for Patton, but staying in place.

“You can... count on... us.” Roman pushed himself to a half kneeling position, gripping his side tightly. 

Patton slowly turned his head, the glazed look fading from his eyes. The warm wind behind him gaining in strength. 

“We’re here... buddy.” Roman whispered.

Thomas nodded. “You’re not alone.” 

“We got... you.”

The curtains behind Patton blazed in sudden brightness, sunlight streaming onto him before flowing past him to saturate Roman and Thomas in warmth and color.

The shadows shrieked, the vines creeping along the corners of the walls withering where the sunlight could reach them. 

Virgil hissed back, squinting his eyes at the light. He stubbornly held his ground, refusing to back away as the light washed over him. Watching as the darkness fled away from the warmth to prowl the edges of the room where the brightness couldn’t reach. 

The light slowed its advance as it lapped against the frozen half of the room holding Logan, melting the edges before the warmth and brightness faded. It left the room tolerable, but not comfortable to Virgil’s heightened senses. Slowly, he lowered his hands, warily watching the shadows as well as the window. What had that been? Why had the light not freed Logan from the ice? He could feel the Logical Side’s eyes on him, but Virgil had to make sure Patton would...well, behave.

Speaking of which. He nearly missed Patton dropping his own outreached hand as he turned back to Virgil. 

“It’s... gone?” He asked with quiet disbelief. He lowered his half-glazed eyes to a small mound of dust at Virgil’s feet. 

Virgil glanced down, toeing the dust before he firmly stepped on it. Crushing it into nothingness. He nodded, wishing he could speak as he offered Patton a smile of confirmation. That particular cardigan would not be reappearing. 

“The cardigan won’t weigh you down anymore, Patton.” Thomas soothed, again shifting in place, but remaining put when Virgil again raised his hand. 

“You’re free... from it, Padre.”

“It’s gone.” Patton repeated slowly, his eyes clearing. The sling holding Patton’s injured arm fading to leave a cast in its place. He reached up with both hands to feel his empty shoulders. “It’s gone.” His eyes welled with tears as he rocked in place, hands gripping his shoulders. _“It’s gone.”_ He cried out, knees buckling. 

Virgil sprang the distance in an instant catching Patton before he hit the ground, silently panicking. Had he done the wrong thing? Should he not have destroyed the cardigan? What else could he hav--

Patton clung to him, his shoulders shaking as he sobbed into Virgil’s chest. “It was so heavy, and dark. I couldn’t take it off. I wanted to, but I couldn’t. The weight...but it’s gone. It’s finally gone.” 

Virgil briefly closed his eyes in relief. He had made the right move. He squeezed Patton tighter, wishing that he could speak to comfort the other Side. But he couldn’t. Not with the room still as heightened as it was. If Virgil spoke now, he’d have to fight the darkness and vines _again._ They’d been lucky twice. But a third time? Instead he had to settle for stroking Patton’s hair. He frowned drawing out small black tendrils of doubt he found tangled there, crushing them with his fingers. He tightened his grip on Patton, silently vowing to be better at protecting him. 

“Patton...you…okay?” Roman rasped out as Patton’s sobs quieted. The Prince had managed to push himself to a sitting position, leaning against the TV stand, his eyes less sunken, but his frame still skeletal in his bright white uniform. 

Patton twisted his head to the wilted prince. “Am I okay?” He choked out, fresh tears streaming down his face, washing away the remaining traces of blood from his face. _“Am I okay?!”_ He straightened from Virgil’s hold. “Roman! Look at _you!”_

Roman brushed his lank hair out of his eyes before giving a lopsided skeleton smile. “I’m...sure I’ve had... worse.” He flinched, gripping his side. “Dr--dragon witch...and all...she’s probably done...worse.”

Patton sobbed, stumbling to kneel at Roman’s side, pulling him into a hug. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. It’s my fault you’re like this. I’m so sorry.” He babbled. 

Roman wrapped one thin arm around him, rocking Patton as he clung to him. “It’s...fine, Padre. It’s fine. I’m fine.” He mumbled, resting his head on Patton’s shoulder. 

Virgil relaxed as the shadows withdrew further. Still not enough. The vines were still there, but he was more confident in turning his attention away from Patton. Roman was the Prince after all. He was good at keeping dangers at bay, even as weak as he was currently. Virgil could trust that Roman would give warning should anything happen. But right now...he needed to rescue Logan.

He turned to him, only to find Thomas already at Logan’s side. He crouched there, tugging forcefully at the frozen chains, pulling them one link at a time out of the ice coating Logan’s body. 

“Hold on Logan, I’ll get you out.” Thomas soothed, pausing to rub at his head with a grimace. “You’ll be free soon. I promise.” 

Virgil silently knelt next to Thomas, relieved to see that despite the apparent headache he was suffering from, Thomas seemed to be the most recovered out of all of them. His reddened eyes and the traces of tears on his cheeks the only indications that he’d been affected as well. 

Thomas looked up as Virgil placed a hand on the chain that Thomas held, pulling it gently from his grip. This would go much faster if Virgil was the one to break the chains. The ice holding Logan wasn’t the thinnest and pulling the chains out would take too much time. 

Virgil raised an eyebrow as Thomas reached out for the chain, grabbing it back and tugging forcefully at the ice. Virgil huffed and grabbed the chain, sparks of purple, snapping the links. 

Thomas jerked back in surprise. “Whoa. I guess...you got this then?” He looked to him. 

Virgil raised an eyebrow. That was obvious. He tilted his head to Thomas. _You okay?_ he mouthed. 

Thomas grimaced, lifting his shoulder in a half shrug. “As alright as I can be...under the circumstances.” He mumbled, looking to Patton. 

Virgil grimaced as well. Yeah. That had been a stupid question. It was clear none of them were okay. 

“What can I do to help you?” Thomas asked in an undertone, indecision clear in his eyes on whether or not he should go to his Heart or stay here. He brushed the chains on Logan. “To keep…” he gestured upwards to the shadows lurking above. “From happening.”

Virgil didn’t need to see the darkness above to know how it was moving. He could already feel it trying to press in again. He checked in on Patton, who had straightened from Roman’s hold. The Injured Side had his thumb pressed against Roman’s cheek, rubbing at the cuts there, leaving behind unmarked skin in the process. 

The tightness in Virgil’s chest lessened. Patton wasn’t reacting to the darkness above which meant he would be fine for a little while longer, so long as he was focused on Roman. Virgil pointed to Logan. _Warm him up._ He mouthed to Thomas.

Thomas didn’t need a second prodding, he grabbed onto Logan’s frozen arm, vigorously rubbing at the ice coating his skin. 

Virgil pulled the ember colored chain in his hand closer, focusing on breaking the links holding Logan in a stupor of thought. Small sparks of purple flashed across their surface, cracking and widening the gaps, until the metal fell apart, crumbling it into dust just like the cardigan had.

“How can you do that?” Thomas whispered, as he worked, the ice melting quickly under his warm touch. “Why have I never seen you do this sort of thing before?” 

Virgil shrugged. He hadn’t needed to use it in front of the others before. He did most of his work from the shadows. Where Thomas wouldn’t see. You couldn’t always fight the darkness in the light after all. He peeked again at Patton as he worked. He was still focused on Roman. Good. It was time to take a small risk. Check in on the state of things. He took a breath, struggling to tone down his voice. _I._ He mouthed, gesturing to Thomas and the others. **“Protect You.”** He said as quietly as he could, wincing at the demonic rumble. 

Thomas started, looking up with wide eyes as the shadows on the edges of the room swirled. “Virgil, your voice.” He whispered, uncertainly. 

Virgil glanced upwards, continuing to break the links holding Logan as he studied the ceiling. Swirling shadows, but no movement towards anyone. He looked to Patton, but the Side didn’t appear to have noticed the shift in the shadows, focused as he was on Roman’s injuries. The corner of Virgil’s lip twitched upwards. Patton was out of the woods for now, but it did confirm he needed to stay silent. The room was too heightened. Too sensitive to Virgil’s presence, if he kept talking it would draw the darkness and affect the others. 

He brushed Thomas’s hand, pulling his attention away from the ceiling. _I’m fine._ He was used to these effects as much as he didn’t like them. The others were not. He gestured to Logan who was now shivering hard enough his form was blurring. _Help him._

Thomas hesitated, chewing the bottom of his lip as he turned to look at Patton. “Do you think I--” 

Virgil waved a hand, getting Thomas’s attention. He shook his head. _Not Patton._ He mouthed, tugging more links of stupor away from Logan’s frozen form. _The Room._

“The Room?” Thomas repeated with surprise, slowly placing his hands once more on Logan’s frozen skin

He nodded, working quickly on the links. _Not safe. Help. Logan._

Thomas’s eyes tightened, the ice melting quickly under his touch as he focused. “What were those chains? Why did they glow?” He asked quietly as Virgil crumbled the last of the links. “Are they different from the ones on Patton’s card--” He cut off, saving Virgil from having to answer as Logan slumped into the two of them. The last of the ice melted from his skin, leaving the Side quivering under their hands as they pushed him back upright. 

“Hold on Logan. We got you.” Thomas reassured him with a smile, adjusting the glasses on Logan’s face. The tension behind Thomas eyes relaxing as Virgil pulled the cotton cloth from Logan’s mouth, tossing it over his shoulder. “You’ll be warm soon.” He said as Logan let out a quivering gasp, teeth chattering nonstop. Thomas pulled him into a hug. “I promise.” He murmured as Logan sank into his hold, shivering violently. 

Virgil’s shoulders slumped the tiniest of margins, warmth spreading through his chest. Finally. He’d done it. He’d managed to free Logan. He’d been able to live up to Logan’s belief in his ability to get him out of this. 

He sighed running a hand through his hair. Well almost out of this. He turned to again check on Patton’s status but stiffened, a soft hiss of displeasure escaping his throat before he could stop himself when a frozen hand clamped over his wrist.Virgile barely kept himself from glaring at Logan. Geez! Lo could have given him a little warning! Ugh. Usually Virgil was the one with the cold hands, but Logan’s touch was like handling dry ice. 

Logan’s teeth chattered as he struggled to speak, focusing on Virgil with wide determined eyes. “Th-Th-Th-Tha-Tha-Than-.” 

Virgil blinked in surprise, warmth tinging his cheeks. Logan...Thanking him? The world had to be ending. He shook his head, twisting his hand in Logan’s grip to place his palm against the logical Side’s cheek. He twitched the corner of his mouth. _Welcome._ He mouthed. 

Relief flashed across Logan’s face before he closed his eyes, ceasing his attempts to talk. He drew in shuddering breaths as he leaned into Virgil’s touch. His hold on Virgil only tightening further as Virgil rubbed his frozen skin. 

“Patton.” 

Virgil jerked at the tone in Thomas’s voice. Oh no. He turned quickly to the other Side, glancing up to the shadows overhead, careful to still keep his hand on Logan’s cheek. But the shadows weren’t reacting. He frowned. Why had Thomas spoken so suddenly then? What had he seen that Virgil hadn’t?

Patton flinched pulling away from Roman, biting his lip as he turned to Thomas, his shoulders hunching as he looked down. “Ye-eah?” 

Thomas glanced to Virgil giving him a reassuring smile. “I got this, You hold Logan” He said quietly, gently pushing him into his arms. 

Virgil automatically wrapped his arms around Logan as he pressed against his hoodie, glasses once more askew as he shivered. “Wa-war-warm.” he mumbled. 

Virgil opened his mouth to speak and grimaced, tense. Right, demon voice. He hated not being able to talk! _Be careful._ He finally mouthed.

Thomas pushed to his feet, laying a hand on Virgil’s shoulder. “It’s okay.” he assured with a smile before he moved to stand in front of Patton. 

“Patton. Look at me.” He said gently

Patton grimaced, only then the shadows above them beginning to swirl. Ever so slowly he lifted his head, struggling to meet Thomas’s eyes. 

Thomas held out his arms. “My turn.” He said quietly, offering a smile. 

Patton stared at him blankly, unmoving. 

Virgil shifted to his knees as the vines rustled along the walls. Intent on the interchange. What was Thomas thinking? Logan mumbled a complaint and Virgil absently rubbed his back to quiet him, focused on Patton, on the darkness swirling above him. Cautiously, he gathered his strength. Ready for another fight. 

“For...what?” Patton asked, finally into the silence.

“For a hug, obviously, Pat. What else would that pose mean? Get over there.” Roman rolled his eyes and shoved Patton when he stayed frozen in place. “I’ll be fine, go.”

Patton staggered to his feet, brushing at his eyes. “Thomas.” He hesitated, gripping his elbows, his feet shifting in sync with the darkness swirling above. “I’m...don’t...I’m sor--”

Thomas closed the distance for him, pulling him into a tight hug. 

Patton stiffened, hands falling to his sides, his breath hitching. 

“It’s alright, Pat.” Thomas murmured, stroking the Side’s hair like Virgil had done earlier. “You don’t have to keep apologizing. We’re all still learning. I’m still learning. I’m sorry too. We’ll work this out together, alright?” 

Patton sobbed, arms lifting to hug Thomas back tightly in response, shaking in his arms. Around them the shadows and vines spasmed, withdrawing again as the room grew brighter. 

Virgil exhaled, the tension in his shoulders relaxing. That had been...he was ready to get out of this place. So ready. 

“Okay.” Patton mumbled in Thomas’s shoulder. “We’ll...we’ll work it out. Together.” He pulled back, stepping away from Thomas. He placed a hand lightly over his heart, covering the sutures from view. “But...but..not today. Okay?” He rubbed the spot, offering an uncertain half smile. “I’ve had enough...uhm…” he looked away. “Feeling for today.” 

Roman reached out his foot, tapping Patton’s ankle. “I think we all have, buddy.” 

Patton ducked his head. “I’m sorry…” he whispered.

Roman kicked Patton a little harder. “Hey. I told you. Dragon Witch. Much more evil. Believe me. I have stories.” 

Patton’s mouth twitched. “I’d...love to hear them Ro...but not...not here in my room. I don’t think we should talk in here anymore.” The corners of his eyes tightened as he glanced to the other three Sides. 

Virgil slumped with relief, nodding in agreement, though he didn’t know if Patton could actually see him do so without his glasses on. In his opinion getting out of this room sooner rather than later would be great. 

Thomas slowly nodded as well, running a hand through his hair pushing his bangs out of his eyes. “Yah..that’s probably...best.” He agreed. “This is going to take time, and we should work out this issue...in a more neutral space. When we’ve all had a chance to recover a little.” He made eye contact with the other three before focusing on Patton. “Sound good, Pat?”

Patton swallowed hard, brushing at his eyes. “Yes.” He choked out.

Thomas reached out his hand, encouraging Patton to take it with a smile. “Discussion tabled for another day, then.” He said, firmly. He gestured to the tattered room. “Patton, could you help me get us out of here? It is your room after all.” 

Virgil jerked upright, jostling Logan in the process. Wait. WHAT?! That wasn’t a good ide---

Patton took a deep breath, placing his other hand over Thomas’s as he exhaled. He gave a single nod and the room vanished in a swirl of colors.


	5. Chapter 5

Virgil shook his head, letting his bangs fall back in front of his eyes as his vision cleared. Gah. He shuddered, closing his eyes to hide from the bright light that assaulted his senses. He _hated_ that method of traveling.

Logan shivered in his arms. “C-c-color.” He mumbled, reaching up with a blue-tinged hand to cover his own eyes, rubbing them. 

Virgil gave Logan a light squeeze of agreement, swallowing the acid climbing his throat. He would have preferred them to have synced out instead of using that kaleidoscopic nightmare of a transition. 

But Patton always did like his use of color, and the fact that he used it now to take them out of his room was a good sign. That didn’t mean the sudden change from darkness to light was helping Virgil’s heightened senses at all though. 

He squinted in the light, frowning. Well, it definitely wasn’t Patton’s room. He could feel that much. But this place had the wrong atmosphere to be Thomas’s living room. It felt safe at least. That much he could tell. He drew a steadying breath, relaxing his hold on Logan as his eyes adjusted. In fact, it looked more like--

“You brought us to the Loft?” Roman asked in surprise, pulling himself shakily to his feet. He was pale, a faint sheen of sweat on his brow, but otherwise his appearance had returned to normal.

“Loft?” Thomas repeated, spinning in a slow circle. “Isn’t this Roman’s?”

“M-Mm-Mind Pal-palace? Yea-Yes.” Logan stuttered, pulling away from Virgil in favor of briskly rubbing his arms.

“Mind Palace was a bit of a mouthful, so we nicknamed it the Loft after a while.” Patton replied, with a sheepish shrug. 

For good reason too. The Loft had taken up residence in what had been the attic of their living space. A spot now mostly used by Roman to belt out Disney songs because he liked the echoey quality to it, even if Thomas didn’t. Virgil too had come up here on occasion as well to pace in the large open area whenever he got too twitchy. 

“We? No, no, that was all you Pat.” Roman denied, leaning against the wall, brushing one of the star hangings with his fingers.

Thomas blinked and grinned. “A good name. I like it. But,” he tilted his head. “Why are we here?” 

“I...I thought it a good halfway point.” Patton ducked his head, toeing at the floor. His appearance too had improved. He had his glasses, taped in the middle but otherwise whole, back on his face. They partially covered his still blackened eyes, a sign that Patton himself was still in a heightened emotional state. However, the other visible signs of his pain had vanished. The cast on his arm gone, his torn shirt fixed and covering the sutures over his heart. “You can come and go from here as you please, Thomas...and so--so can we...and with the others...current state.” He hunched his shoulders. “It will take less energy for us to leave here than from your living room.” 

Virgil snorted, getting to his feet. Less energy? Yah, they could just walk down the stairs from here. He reached down, pulling Logan stiffly to his feet as well. Logan hunched over, arms gripping his sides as he trembled, his skin covered in goosebumps. Virgil made sure the Logical Side was steady before he turned to Patton. **“Good.”** The demonic rumble coming from his throat had everyone tensing. Thomas and Roman both looked up to the ceiling with widened eyes. Roman grabbed at his sword, half drawing it. 

A flash of fear crossed over Patton’s face as took a step forward. “Virge--” 

Virgil lifted a hand, to stop Patton and shook his head, clearing his throat, pleased to finally feel the heightened anxiety fade. He smiled. “Good idea, Dad.” 

Patton relaxed, eyes softening. “Thanks, kiddo.” He said, quietly. 

Roman exhaled, sheathing his sword, leaning back against the wall. “Don’t freak us out like that Virge.” 

“We thought-” Thomas took another wary look around the room, moving his arm protectively over Patton’s shoulders. “Those shadow things didn’t follow us did they?”

Virgil shook his head, fighting back a laugh at the image of the vines and shadows traveling through Patton’s rainbow explosion of color. He doubted they’d survive it. “No, it doesn’t work like that.” He said instead, stuffing his hands into his jacket’s pockets. “We’re good here.” he added, when Thomas didn’t look convinced. “The Loft is supposed to be a neutral zone right? To work out problems. So there’s nothing to worry about here. It’s safe.”

Thomas nodded thoughtfully, relaxing his hold on Patton, but still keeping an arm around him. “Good to know.” He looked around the room again. “When we’re all rested and recovered, perhaps we should come back here.”   
Patton leaned into Thomas’s side, his uninjured arm wrapping around Thomas’s back. “I would like that.” 

“I’ll work on fixing the echo here, to make it easier to talk.” Roman volunteered, pushing unsteadily from the wall to shuffle over to Thomas and Patton.

Thomas reached out to pull Roman into a half hug. “That’s a good idea, Roman... though,” he shot him a concerned look. “Don’t push too hard on it alright? Close together like this, it’s not so bad in here.” He smiled to Virgil and Logan, raising his eyebrows, his fingers twitching. 

Virgil rolled his eyes. He knew that look. Patton often had it right before he’d ask for a hug. “What? You want us all to do a group hug or something?” 

Thomas laughed, nodding. “Yes.” 

Roman smirked. “Come over here, you two.” 

Virgil huffed, shrugging his shoulders, but didn’t voice any complaints. He did flinch, hissing as Logan laid a cold hand on his shoulder. “Warn me next time.” He muttered 

“S-s-sorry.” Logan mumbled as they joined the others. Logan moved to Roman’s side, leaving Virgil to close   
the gap between him and Patton.

“Whoa.” Roman inhaled sharply, cringing as he wrapped his arm around Logan. “Dude, you’re frozen!” 

“Re-rea-really? I h-h-h-hadn’t no-no-noticed.” Logan mumbled, very carefully not looking at Patton. 

Patton bit his lip, looking away from Logan. 

“We’ll work it out, guys.” Thomas soothed, looking between all of them. “When we’re all thinking a bit clearer and feeling a bit better alright?” He squeezed them tightly. “Through thick and thin, we’ll work this out.” 

_“Because we’re all in this together.”_ Roman chimed in, half singing. 

Virgil groaned, pulling out of the hug. “I am _not_ doing a group sing along. Count me out.” 

Thomas laughed as Roman pouted. “Maybe a different night.” 

“Or never.” Virgil muttered. 

“Come on, Sir Negative, it would be fun!” Roman said, releasing Thomas to rub at Logan’s shoulders.

“Pass.” Virgil waved a hand. “I’m not singing unless there’s a video involve--” He cut off seeing Roman’s eyes light up. “Scratch that, Princey. I. Am. Not. Singing. Period.” 

“You said you woul--”

“I said forget it.” 

Thomas chuckled, lifting his hand up to cover his mouth as he yawned. “Figure it out later guys. I think,” he yawned again. “I think we’re done for tonight on deciding anything.” He squeezed Patton’s shoulders.

“We all should get some rest. Especially you, Thomas.” Patton replied, leaning into Thomas’s hug briefly before he pulled back, rubbing his heart.

Thomas flashed a tired smile. “Don’t I know it.” He took a step back, meeting everyone’s eyes before giving a small wave. “Sleep well guys.” Thomas took on a yellow glow, disappearing from sight. 

Virgil tensed, fighting down the flaring desire to go check and make sure Thomas had safely returned to his living room. It would be fine. Thomas would be fine. He’d just barely left. Priorities. Right now Logan and Roman both needed to be the priority, since both of them were barely standing as it was. He took Logan’s free arm, moving it over his shoulders to support him. “Pat, could you help take Princey to his room? I got Logan.” 

“Excuse me.” Roman straightened, lifting his chin. “I can walk to my room just--” He turned to take a step and staggered, only avoiding face planting by Patton grabbing onto him. 

“Roman….careful.” Patton’s eyes glinted as he blinked rapidly, pulling Roman’s arm over his shoulder. “You aren’t at full strength yet…” the words _because of me_ hung unspoken in the air.

“I-I--” Roman coughed, ducking his head to hide his reddening cheeks. “I suppose...I am not quite my fabulous self yet.” he conceded finally. “Thanks for the help, Pat.” 

“No problem, Ro” Patton mumbled. “Let’s get you to bed.” He gave Virgil a hesitant smile, eyes sliding away from Logan before, he guided Roman to the stairs, disappearing down them. 

Virgil exhaled, briefly pinching the bridge of his nose. One step at a time. Not everything could be fixed tonight. He’d have to worry about Logan and Patton making up later after they both had had some time to recover.

“How are you feeling now?” He asked Logan as they shuffled towards the stairs.

Logan grimaced, still trembling hard enough to nearly shake his glasses off. “Fro-Fro-Froze-zen.” He mumbled, haltingly moving down each step. 

Virgil nodded, wishing his body temperature ran a bit warmer like Patton’s as he pulled Logan’s arm over his shoulders. He wouldn’t do much good in warming Logan up when Virgil was usually the coldest of the Sides. “Better or worse than when Thomas gets a brain freeze?”

Logan shuddered, closing his eyes. “In-in-in-infin-” He stumbled on the last step, only Virgil’s quick reflexes keeping him from slipping to the ground. Logan shuddered, stiffly straightening again. “W-w-orse.” 

Virgil pressed his lips in a thin line. He’d figured as much, but it still didn’t make him happy to hear it. “You’ll warm up soon enough, Lo.” He said, hiding his concern. Logan had been the last one freed. He hadn’t experienced that warm light in Patton’s room at all. Just the ice and the chains of stupor. “Don’t worry about that.” The effects wouldn’t last. Logan just needed to recover. Virgil pushed open the door to Logan’s place, moving them inside. 

Logan let out a shaky breath, closing his eyes as he stopped just inside. “H-h-home.” 

“Mhmmm, but you’re not going to get warm standing here, come on.” Virgil said lightly shoving Logan to get him moving again. Usually, Virgil didn’t mind being in Logan’s organized chaos of a room, but for the last little while it had looked more like a conspiracy theorist’s study, making it difficult for Virgil to focus when he’d dropped by. Even now, there were still papers and pictures carefully taped onto the walls, with strings crisscrossing the living space with it’s minimalistic furniture, connecting to each other in ways that Virgil was sure Logan himself didn’t quite understand. The mind would associate the oddest bits of information together, which was why Logan liked word association games. It created more connections, no matter how bizarre. 

Fortunately, Logan’s place mimicked more of the home that Thomas had grown up in. Which meant that his bedroom was within easy access from the main door. Virgil doubted, with how stiffly Logan was moving, that he would be able to thread his way through the spiderweb of connections if his room had copied Thomas’s current apartment. 

Logan’s bedroom was by far neater, mostly holding books along the walls making it easy for them both to navigate the space to his bed. 

Logan pulled his glasses off his face, setting them haphazardly on the nightstand before he burrowed under the covers without prompting, curling up in a shivering ball. Virgil shook his head, pulling the warmest blankets he could find from the hallway closet to help cover the Side. Logan moaned with relief at the extra warmth, his tense muscles relaxing slowly. 

Virgil stood awkwardly at the side of the bed, playing with the string of his hoodie, unsure what else he could do. “You’ll warm up soon Lo.” He finally said, patting the mound under the blankets. “Don’t worry.” He turned away.

“Vir-Vir-Virgil.” Logan stuttered. 

Virgil paused, looking back. “Yah?” 

The Logical Side peered up at him from under the blankets, eyes softening. “I-I knew you-you’d s-s-s-save uh-uh-uh-us. Than-Thanks.” 

Virgil gave a one shoulder shrug, feeling his cheeks heating up as his stomach fluttered. Logan was thanking him. He had believed Virgil would come through. And he had. “Whatever, Specs.” He mumbled, pulling at the sleeves of his jacket. “Anyone else could have done the same thing.” 

“N-n-no.” Logan denied. “Ju-just...you.” 

Virgil shook his head, his feet shifting in place, heart in his throat. “Only because I’m good at playing the bad guy.” It was his job after all. That’s how Logan knew he could do it. He looked away. “Two negatives make a positive. It’s simple math.” 

Logan reached out, grabbing onto Virgil’s wrist. “N-no-not s-s-so si-si-simple.” He said as firmly as he could with his teeth chattering. “S-s-seriou--ously. Vir-vir...gil. Th-thanks.” He squeezed it, gently before letting go, pulling it back under the covers. “You-you’re a g-g-g-good g-guh-guy, nah-na-not a vi-vil-villain.” 

Virgil rolled his eyes, his face heating up further. He never knew what to do in the face of compliments, mostly because he rarely got them before. “Alright, Alright. You’re welcome, Lo. Stop talking before my face burns off from embarrassment..” 

Logan’s eyes sparked. “M-m-my he-hero.” 

He groaned, turning away. Obviously, Logan’s brain still needed to thaw. “Stop being sappy, you sap.” He said, shutting the door behind him. He moved out into the hallway, tilting his head as he heard the mumble of voices coming from Roman’s room. Patton was still with the Creative Side. Good. That would give him just enough time to check in on Thomas. 

Virgil synced out of the mindscape, reappearing in Thomas’s living room. He tensed upon seeing Thomas sprawled out on the couch, unconscious. Instinctively, he darted to Thomas’s side, kneeling to check for a pulse. It was stupid. So stupid to worry about this. He’d know if Thomas was dying. But that didn’t stop him from having to double check that Thomas was just sleeping. It was his nature.

Virgil relaxed as he felt Thomas’s heartbeat under his fingers. It was running a bit fast, not surprising considering what they’d all just gone through, but it was there. Virgil exhaled, brushing the bangs away from Thomas’s eyes as he straightened. It was no wonder Thomas had collapsed on the nearest soft surface as soon as he got back. He’d been put through the emotional ringer today. If he woke up before noon tomorrow it would be a miracle. 

Virgil gently pulled the blanket from off the back of the couch, spreading it out over Thomas so he wouldn’t freeze before he nodded to himself. Now that he was satisfied that Thomas was alright, he could push away that worry now, at least. Virgil sank out, reappearing in the hallway outside everyone’s rooms. Rubbing the back of his neck, he glanced to the others' doors. Logan’s was shut as was Roman’s. He turned to Patton’s room where his door was ope-- “PAT” Virgil yelled, as he comprehended the scene in front of him.

Patton jumped violently with a gasp, whirling from his own bedroom doorway, hand over his heart. 

“What are you doing?” Virgil hissed, grabbing Patton by the arm that hadn’t been injured, tugging him forcefully away from the doorway. 

Patton blinked owlishly at him, stumbling as Virgil pulled him further into the hallway to stand between Roman and Logan’s doors. Behind him, Patton’s door swung slowly shut with a click.

“I...was going to my room?” he said, offering an uncertain smile as his eyes darted about. “Roman’s fast asleep.” He gave a soft laugh, pulling his hand free from Virgil’s grip to rub at his heart. “He was telling me about the Dragon Witch, but trailed off mid word. Basically as soon as his head hit the pillow.” 

Virgil shook his head, heart racing with adrenaline as he moved to put himself between Patton and the doorway. He could have missed him going back to his room! It was lucky Virgil hadn’t felt the need to spend more time at Thomas’s or Logan’s sides. If he’d lingered...Patton could have already been inside. Back alone with the darkness and shadows. His hands clenched. He wouldn’t let that happen. No. He would protect him. “Why in the world would you think it alright to go back in there!” He demanded, tone sharp.

Patton leaned back under Virgil’s glare, fingers digging at his heart as he looked away, biting his lip. “It’s my room, kiddo…” he said softly. “Where else am I to sleep? I can’t be around the others right now. I won’t bother them in my room.”

“It’s. not. safe.” 

Patton bit his lip, fear flickering in his eyes even as he tried to reassure Virgil with a small smile. “It’s...fine….I’m used to…” 

Virgil growled, grabbing Patton’s wrist once more. “Dad, you’re not sleeping there.” He stated, meeting Patton’s eyes. “Your room is _worse_ than my room right now and I am not going to let you subject yourself further to that viper’s nest.” 

Patton gaped at him before slowly shaking his head. “No, it can’t be...Virgil. Kiddo.” His tone softened. “I’ll be fine. It’s fine.” He tugged gently at Virgil’s grip, but Virgil refused to let go. 

“No.” 

“Virge.”

“I said. No.” 

“But there’s nowhere else for me to stay!” Patton snapped.

“My room.”   
He stiffened. “You’re joking.” 

Virgil’s eyes flashed as he straightened. “I’m not. You’ll be alright there.” 

“But last time--”

“Do you trust me, Dad?” Virgil asked quietly, expression softening. “To protect you?” 

Patton didn’t hesitate, meeting his eyes, as he dropped his hand from his chest. “Of course, kiddo.” 

Virgil gave a smile, warm relief rushing through him. He’d wondered if Patton really did trust him, especially after how he’d appeared in Patton’s room. He let go of his wrist, spreading his hands in a peaceful gesture. “Then stop fighting me and let me do so.” 

Patton licked his lips, eyes flickering between his room and Virgil’s. He exhaled running a hand through his hair. “Alright, Virgil.” He agreed...just for tonight though.” He said, lowering his hand to grasp at his neck where the sleeves of the cardigan used to hang. 

“For as long as you need it.” Virgil replied, only moving from his defensive spot when Patton had taken his own steps towards Virgil’s room. 

Patton drew close to Virgil, his other hand gripping Virgil’s arm as they entered into Virgil’s quarters, eyeshadow almost instantaneously forming under Patton’s eyes, though it was hardly noticeable considering Patton’s black eyes already. He inhaled raggedly. “Ki-Kiddo.” 

“Breathe.” Virgil said, offering him a reassuring smile. “You’re in a heightened state of emotional turmoil already, so this part is going to feel bad right now, but you’re going to be fine okay? I'm here, and I can protect you. Just breathe. I promise it won’t feel like this the entire time.” He kept up a steady string of reassurances as Patton reluctantly moved deeper into the living room. He squeezed his eyes shut, tears glistening on his lashes as Virgil led him through the living room and up the stairs. 

“Virgil...I...I can’t.” He whispered, trembling. “It’s so…” 

“It’s just a little further, Pat. I promise.” Virgil reassured, squeezing Patton’s hand as he pulled him through the doorway, making sure the bedroom door was firmly shut. “Alright. We’re here.” 

Patton drew in a shuddering breath and slowly opened one eye. He gasped, straightening. “This is your bedroom?” 

Virgil gave a dry laugh. “What? You thought I slept in a crypt or something?” He carefully extracted himself from Patton’s loosening grip. 

“Not...no, but like downstairs.” He mumbled. “With the creepy crawly death dealers.” He turned in place at the warmly lit room. Cheerful orange light shown over a large bed, covered in soft purple themed quilts. Posters of Evanescence and My Chemical Romance hung on the walls, while a cluster of pictures of him with the other Sides stood on his nightstand. 

Virgil chuckled, “You didn’t see, but I replaced the spider curtains after you guys left the first time, you don’t have to worry about encountering anything like that here.” 

Patton sniffed, reaching under his glasses, brushing at his eyes. “You did…for me?” 

Virgil shrugged. “Well...yah. If you don’t like spiders I’m not going to subject you to them if you decide to drop by.” He moved to the closet and dug through it as Patton, keeping an eye on him as he moved about the room. Patton’s eyes had brightened with interest, the black around them fading. 

“I can’t believe this is your room.” He said softly. 

“Mhmmm.” Virgil shrugged. “Well...you can probably understand now why I prefer to stay in here on bad days.” 

Before the others had accepted him, here was the only place he’d felt...safe, though the bedroom hadn’t been nearly as inviting. It had only warmed up like this once the others had begun to reach out and include him.

Patton picked up a picture of both him and Virgil together in the kitchen, stroking it’s edges. “I can see why, but...I don’t understand.” He said, sitting on the bed, looking to Virgil as he shut the closet door, holding his old hoodie in his hands. “I don’t feel...anxious in here.”

It wasn’t that complicated. Virgil shrugged, moving back to him. “Anxiety wants you to stay home right? Not do anything?” Virgil gestured to the warm light coming from the corner by his bed. “That’s because you’re safest in bed.” So long as the light shown, there was nothing to fear here. “That’s why I wanted you to stay here for a bit. It’s safe. You can just...be yourself here. Without worrying about what anyone else thinks.” 

Patton’s stared down at the picture in his hands, a genuine smile coming onto his face as he looked up. “I’d love that. To not...worry...or…” he shrugged, setting the picture back down on the night table, his hand reaching up once more to his neck.

It was now or never. Virgil swallowed, holding out the hoodie to Patton. “Here. Take this.” 

Patton blinked, hand freezing over his heart. “That’s your old hoodie.”

“I’m aware, yes.” 

“But. Why?”

“I want you to have it.” 

Patton stared at him blankly. “What?” 

Virgil rolled his eyes. “I want you to have it.” he repeated, lightly shaking it in front of Patton’s face. 

Still confused, Patton reached up, reverently taking it in his hands. He grinned in sudden delight. “It’s soft!” He cried pressing it against his face, his tense shoulders relaxing.

“Why do you think I never took it off? It’s warm too. Comforting.” But more importantly, it could also be a shield that would protect Patton from the shadows when Virgil wasn’t nearby to do so himself. 

Virgil sat on the bed, fiddling with the strings of his new hoodie. “I thought you could wear it until you find something else to replace that cardigan I destroyed.” He chewed his lip anxiously studying Patton, who’d gone still. “You don’t have to though.” He added in quickly. He wouldn’t make him do anything he didn’t want to do. “I just thou--” He yelped as Patton pulled him into a hug. He gasped for air, biting back a complaint of not being able to breathe as Patton broke down sobbing into his shoulder. 

“This...this...is...the bestest, most wonderful...Virgil” He choked out. “Thank you.” 

Virgil gently hugged him back. “Anything for you, Dad.” He whispered. “Anything.”


End file.
